What does someone think can never be the same, and every thought, action, reaction, etc., will differ from person to person. Being in a relationship related to getting married, especially in India, it feels… weighty. Like you’re standing at the edge. With family: So many family meetings! Meeting his parents, his extended family, and them meeting mine.
Endless cups of chai, polite conversations, and trying to gauge if everyone is happy. It’s not just my happiness that matters; it’s everyone’s. I have to be gracious and respectful and make a good impression. As the event day is set, the planning starts almost immediately, even if the wedding is months away. Discussions about venues, guest lists, outfits, ceremonies… It’s overwhelming, and honestly, sometimes you feel like the actual relationship gets lost in the wedding planning, also family custom: His family has their traditions, their ways of doing things.
I’m trying to learn them, understand them, and show that I respect them. It’s like learning a new language of family dynamics. My mother keeps giving me advice on how to behave, what to say, and what not to say. It’s sweet but also adds pressure. As we know, India is a country with a rich culture and tradition, where family is always given the priority, so it’s not just about connecting with him, but with his entire family. Especially his mother. My mother says a good relationship with the mother-in-law is the foundation of a happy marriage. So, I try to be thoughtful, call her, and ask about her day. It’s a conscious effort to build that bond. These are some thoughts that might occur when we are in a relationship or pre-marital season, where we are trying to balance our old life with the new. Life is always a moving forward event and journey.